I would wish a strenuous gym workout on my worst enemy – but without the health benefits.

How did the mourners at the gym employee’s funeral know that the gym employee was going to be reincarnated?
There was a sign on the casket that read “Scheduled for Service.”

The other day an article in my news feed listed the exercises trainers don’t want us to do.  Naturally I jumped at the chance to delete something from my routine and, sure enough, the hip adduction and abduction machines were listed.  I don’t use the hip abduction machine – if I did, I’d have a joke about its name ready in my back pocket – but I do use the hip adduction machine.  So, I read further.  The reasoning was that the motion of pushing something between your inner thighs and closing them does not occur in nature. Alternate exercises were suggested, but I stopped reading.  For one thing, the day before I had used my inner thighs to help close the handles/levers/arms of the lopper I was using to cut a tree branch.  For another thing, none of the alternate exercises allowed for sitting down!

Balance is a subject I’ve paid more attention to as I get older, especially since my balance has never been good.  The easiest way “they say” to better one’s balance is to stand on one foot for as long as possible.  But when does that happen in nature?  Only if you’re reaching for something or as part of a game or you’re on crutches.  Falling happens.  What’s really called for is the ability to get up.  And for that, we’re talking arms …